


Get Over Him, Dumbass

by Crowley_Winchester



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Babbling, Drunken Confessions, Drunkenness, Episode: s04e04 Mac's Banging The Waitress, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:48:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24686401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crowley_Winchester/pseuds/Crowley_Winchester
Summary: Dennis lets Charlie into his room after he listens in on Mac and Charlie's argument outside. Now is the time to strike and ensure that Charlie views him as his best friend for good. However, things get a little more genuine than Dennis intended.
Relationships: Charlie Kelly & Dennis Reynolds, Charlie Kelly/Dennis Reynolds
Comments: 3
Kudos: 52





	Get Over Him, Dumbass

“I don’t have any hard evidence, but that’s just how it feels from where I’m standing, and he’s gonna break your heart, man. And when he breaks your heart, I’ll be here to pick up the pieces and put you back together, ‘cause that’s what a real best friend does.”

Dennis didn’t realise how much he was going to have to pick up the pieces when he said that. Charlie stumbling past him into his room, too drunk to really know where he was, put it in perspective very quickly. He had a lot of work ahead of him. The man pressed his lips together, glaring at Mac’s door from across the apartment before shutting his own. 

“Charlie, get away from my fucking bed.”

“Wha-” Charlie, who had just been about to collapse face-first, stopped himself, swaying slightly with a small frown on his face. “Bu you jus said-”

“Yeah, I know what I said, but I’m having second thoughts. I don’t want you to piss all over the bed.” 

“‘M not! Everyone keeps sayin ‘m gonna piss, ‘m not.” 

The rather-pathetic expression on Charlie’s face as he looked down at his feet caused Dennis to sigh. He couldn’t treat Charlie the same as Mac did; that would completely ruin the point of trying to be his best friend. They needed to have best-friend talk. Best-friend times. “Let’s get you washed off, alright? Maybe some of that smell will get off you.”

Charlie narrowed his eyes, an exaggerated frown on his face. “Shower...together?”

“What? No! Just come on.” Dennis quickly walked over, arms wrapping around Charlie as the other staggered forward. “Jesus, you really fucking stink, man.”

“I know. Sorry,” Charlie mumbled, leaning into the touch, eyes shut. Everything hurt and he felt like shit and he just wanted to sleep.

Dennis staggered back as he suddenly was supporting much more of Charlie’s weight than he had expected, his face scrunching up as the inescapable smell of sweat and alcohol raced up his nostrils. “I’m gonna be sick,” he muttered as he dragged the drunk into the bathroom, Charlie’s weak attempt at walking not particularly helpful.

He dumped Charlie on the toilet, turning his back to turn on the shower. “Just holler if you need- CHARLIE!”

In the perhaps two seconds Dennis hadn’t been watching Charlie, the man had shimmied out of his clothes, and was now sprawled naked across the toilet. “God damn it, what the hell?”

“‘M sorry! I thought-” 

“It doesn’t matter, dude, just get in the shower,” Dennis ordered, scrunching up his eyes and pointing to the running water. God, that was not what he had intended to see today. 

Charlie slurred something else that Dennis didn’t know or care to translate, and he waited until the shower curtain was definitely closed before opening his eyes again. “I’m gonna get you some clothes, alright? This fucking stink.”

“Bu I didn’ bring any!”

“Yeah, well good thing I have my dresser here,” Dennis replied, crouching on the bathroom floor and picking up the sweat-covered items. These really were disgusting. Probably should be burnt, as well as the clothes he was currently wearing. Those were coated with Charlie’s stench, thanks to the other rubbing all over him.

“Wear...your clothes?” Charlie poked his head out from behind the shower curtain, another frown on his face.

“Duh. I’m not sleeping next to you naked, and this shit is not stinking up my bed.”

Before Charlie could try and protest or ask more questions, Dennis was gone from the bathroom, already peeling his clothes off that were coated in the second-hand stench. This was going to be a long night. 

Eventually, Dennis heard the water stop running. He was changed into a new shirt and sweatpants, holding similar clothes in his hand for Charlie. “Hey, I’m just gonna leave the clothes on the toilet seat, man.”

“‘Mkay.”

Dennis quickly left as Charlie opened the shower curtain, retreating back to his bed. The drunk was clearly out of it. He was definitely going to be out of it enough that it didn’t matter Dennis had snapped at him and made him feel bad. The only thing he was going to remember was that Dennis, the saviour, had rescued him from being forced to sleep on the couch and had given him fresh clothes. All very best-friendsy things to do.

By the time Charlie staggered back out of the bathroom, Dennis was scrolling through his phone in bed, raising an eyebrow at the still-haggard but significantly cleaner figure in the doorway. “Can I sleep now?”

“Right side of the bed is all yours, Charlie.”

Dennis turned his attention back to his phone, but paused when he realised Charlie wasn’t moving. A glance up showed that the man was standing at the foot of the bed with a furrowed brow, holding up his hands in an L shape. “What the hell are you doing?”

“The right...is it lefty loosey? I forget which hand is supposed to be tighty…”

Dennis stared at Charlie for a long moment before patting the empty half of the bed. “This half, bud. The empty side is the right one.”

“Ohhh.” Charlie nodded, shuffling over and practically collapsing on the right side. Dennis sighed, sitting up and adjusting the covers around the other. “Nigh, Dennis.”

“Night, Charlie.”

Dennis turned off his phone, turning his back to his bed’s newest occupant. Sometimes he really did wonder what could possibly be going through Charlie’s head. He had heard him in the living room as he drunk himself into oblivion. Charlie had a habit of talking mindlessly to himself when he got drunk enough, and Dennis had heard every word. First, it had been innocent stuff. How he hoped Mac was going to come back soon, how good the stupid pizza tasted. But, like all things involving Charlie, it quickly went off the rails. It became about how Mac was always abandoning him for anyone else, how no one in the gang seemed to really care about him. How it wasn’t fair the Waitress would fuck anyone but him. How he just felt so lonely. Dennis had almost stepped right in there, but he knew he needed to have Mac reject Charlie to really be able to pick up the pieces. And everything worked out perfectly as planned, just as he-

A sound caused Dennis’ thoughts to pause, turning his head slightly towards the noise. Wait. No, it couldn’t be. “Charlie, are you crying?”

“No!” Definitely crying. The tiny sob which had escaped Charlie’s mouth was now being accompanied by increasingly loud sniffles. Dennis rolled over, propping himself up on his shoulders as he looked down at the other. 

“Hey, man, you ok?”

“Fine! ‘M fine!”

Dennis hated shit like this. Hated people getting vulnerable around him. It was one thing if it was girls he was picking up, but with friends he was expected to be vulnerable in return, and if he was vulnerable? Well, people would definitely take advantage of him. But to be Charlie’s best friend, they had to have some sort of bonding time. So Dennis reached out, a tentative hand resting on Charlie’s shaking elbow. “You sure, man?”

Charlie rolled over, Dennis’ mouth twisting as he saw the mess of tears and snot running down the other’s face onto his sheets. “Come on, Charlie, you can’t cry like this, it’s making a fucking mess. Just spit it out.”

“It’s MAC!” The name came out almost strangled-sounding, and Charlie burst into tears, his hands coming up to cover his face. “He-he, he’s always been there, y’know? Always. Did everythin together, and now he doesn’t...doesn’t care! He just thinks ‘m gonna PISS, and ‘m not! ‘M a person with FEELINGS and nobody CARES! He was supposed to be my friend and he just doesn’t CARE! And ‘m ALONE!”

Mac really had broken Charlie’s heart, there was no denying it. The manipulative part of Dennis (also known as the primary part), knew this was the opportunity he had been looking for. A way to wedge himself permanently in Charlie’s life, to overthrow Mac as the best friend. To, as he himself had phrased it so eloquently earlier, pick up the pieces and put Charlie back together. But there was a much smaller part of Dennis that everyone, including himself, usually ignored. The part that actually had some degree of feelings. And the smaller part was what kept his hand on the other’s shoulder.

“Hey. Come on. I’m here, aren’t I? You’re not alone, Charlie. I promise.”

Charlie pulled his hands down from his face, tears still streaming, but the look in his eyes was something Dennis wasn’t used to being gazed with. Hope. Before he could react, Charlie was wrapping his arms around him, nuzzling tightly into the crook of his neck. 

“Please don’t leave me, Dennis. I need you.”

The mumbled words ensured that Dennis wasn’t going to push Charlie off, even as he felt the tears and what was hopefully not (but definitely was) snot on his bare neck. Instead, Dennis wrapped his arms around the other obligingly, gently rubbing Charlie’s back. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

As he was held, the tears slowly subsided until they disappeared entirely, Charlie eventually drifting off to sleep while being held, his hands wrapped tightly in the fabric of Dennis’ shirt. Dennis, however, didn’t have such an easy time. He was used to being touched, anywhere and everywhere. He had been with some pretty freaky women, to say the least. But this was something else. Something approaching on genuine. Something that he didn’t even realise he even wanted, let alone needed. But, for now, it was nice. With Charlie snoring in his ear, Dennis nuzzled his face into the other and let his eyes slip shut. It didn’t matter, anyways. Charlie was too drunk to remember it in the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing anything from It's Always Sunny, so let me know what you think!


End file.
